Posted by: kristabella | March 12, 2008

It’s Probably The Eating For Two Thing

I had a doctor’s appointment this morning. No, I really had a doctor’s appointment. I wasn’t making up excuses for an interview. Which sucks because now I can’t use the doctor’s appointment line for a few months lest someone think something is up.

It was my annual lady doctor appointment. Last year at this time, I went to the doctor just hoping to get a refill on my birth control prescription and to get in and out of there as fast as possible. Little did I know that not too soon after that appointment last year my world was going to turn on its head. For one, I was going to lose my job not too soon after when they found my blog. In addition, my lady doctor found a lump last year that she didn’t like and wanted me to get checked out. (It’s fine.) March and April of 2007 were not the best times of my life.

Thankfully this year’s appointment went off without a hitch. I mean except for the fact that someone has their hands up your va-jay-jay, it was fine. And ladies, don’t you just love when they are all “does this hurt?” And you just want to be all “you have your hands in my hoo hah! It’s not pleasant! At least not without buying me dinner first!”

So I obviously go to an OB/GYN office for my appointment. Your general doctor is for stuffy noses and sore throats. I want an expert to examine me in the nether regions. And I also only want a woman. Because she has the parts. And I couldn’t handle a hot male doctor. Talk about awkward.

Anyway. I did not mean to ramble on for so many paragraphs about vaginas. As I was sitting in the waiting room today there were quite a few pregnant ladies. And all of a sudden a wave of emotion came over me. I really want to be pregnant. Preferably sooner rather than later.

That’s weird, right? I mean it is clear how much I love kids and I’ve never had a doubt that I would be a mother. But in recent weeks I’ve been thinking about pregnancy and about being pregnant and haven’t been completely freaked the fuck out by it. It is quite possibly because I read far too many mommy blogs and a lot of bloggers are preggers or trying. Or because I follow celebrity news far too closely and there are BABIES EVERYWHERE! Or because spring = frolicking. Regardless, it is there. There is this itch to be pregnant. One that won’t be scratched, mind you, in some time.

This is a first. Like I said, I’ve pretty much always wanted kids. But I wasn’t too pleased with the whole process, with the stretching of things and the swelling of other things and do you know how they get that thing out of you? Pregnancy was always something that made you have to stop drinking and a means to a baby with a yummy smelling head.

But for some reason, I’ve gotten over all that. And I want to experience the joy of the pregnancy, all the ups and the downs. And I’m even OK with the delivery. Albeit by C-section, though. Or with a LOT of drugs.

So that’s just insane, right? Besides the obvious facts of being single, not dating and on birth control. What did you say? I can’t hear you over that infernal TICKING CLOCK.


And also, today is BFF Julie’s birthday, so I just want to wish her a very happy birthday! Not everyone gets Top Chef to premiere on the anniversary of their birth. Have a wonderful day and here’s to many more fun drinking nights in our future. Cheers, Big Ears! Love ya!



  1. That clock is ever so powerful. Every time I think mine is in check, it sneaks back up on me…damn hormones.

    Happy birthday to your friend!

  2. Wow! I’d LOVE to be Mahnee again….LOVE TO!!!!!!!!!!!

    Happy birthday, Julie!!!!! I will NOT, however, mark your natal day by tripping over a curb & falling….well, atleast I hope not.

  3. I’ve always felt the major decisions just hit me in life. I never worried about them until I got knocked over the head with them. Though I know I want children, I’m not too worried about it. It’ll happen when it happens. Though, ask me again after my annual exam in a few weeks. 🙂

    LOVE LOVE LOVE Top Chef. Stoked it was filmed in Chicago this season. So sad I have a condo board meeting tonight. Hopefully it won’t last too long.

    Happy Birthday to Julie!

  4. You look EXACTLY like Clare Danes in that picture. For real.

  5. That’s funny. I get the “must be pregnant NOW” urge every now and again, but never at the OB/GYN. At the doctor’s office I’m more like, “Get out of here, pregnant people! We are here to IMPEDE our fertility. And take your stupid ‘Fit Pregnancy’ magazines with you and bring me some goddamn US Weekly.”

  6. My OB/GYN is male but he is NOT HOT so we are good there. I had a female OB when I had the sprog but she was a real biatch so now I don’t mind having a male doctor. He’s actually a lot more gentle than she ever was, weird?

  7. The ticking clock thing happened exactly the same for me. Although I never really thought I’d have kids. Then one day, WHAM, I desperately wanted to get pregnant. It’s kind of weird, when you think about it. I don’t like having so little control over my desires, without actually being drunk.

  8. I hear ya on the female ‘lady parts doc’. I go to a practice that is primarily female doctors (3 to 1). I have seen the male there, and he’s a MUCH older gentleman, so we’re good there. A friend of mine says she sees a hottie OB/GYN though, and I’m not sure how she manages to spread ’em for him every year. I’ll stick with the doctor that actually has the same parts and knows that spreading your insides open with tongs is NOT pleasurable.

    And if you’ve got a child itch – I’ve got a 6 yr old and an almost 4 yr old you can borrow ANY.TIME. Just name the time. 😉

  9. I get that feeling too.

    But then I remember how they come out and that things will never be the same down there again because of the ripping.

    And then I cry.

  10. That’s so big, isn’t that damn ticking clock a pain in the butt?

    Happy Birthday, Julie!

  11. I like babies, but when they start crying, I like to be able to pass them off to someone else to take care of.

    Happy birthday, Julie!

  12. That’s a hard one. I didn’t have my 1st until I was 30, 2nd at 33 and had previously been to “plan you life without kids” because I had been trying to get pregnant for 3 years. See that? A three year cycle for me!

    So, I know that pang of desire to have a baby. A puzzlement indeed.

    First, lets get ya a b’friend … with an older brother, I need one too!

  13. I know a now former governor who likes to get it on with younger women. Maybe I can arrange a date!


    Play it right, you might even get paid!

    OMG, that is so wrong, but still, I crack me up.

  14. I’ve definitely got the itch to be preggers….but I really don’t want to actually have a child. I don’t want the responsibility. Hell, I can barely take care of myself. So I’d like to be pregnant…but not have a baby. That doesn’t even make sense. I guess what I’m trying to say…is that I feel ya!

  15. Thanks for the bday wishes, Blee-aach. I can’t wait to spend my night watching the premiere of Top Chef Chi-town. Holy Colicchio! 😉

    Mahnee, I will try to be careful today. But for the record, I was so NOT making fun about that… I care. Lots.

    Love ya!

  16. I know exactly how you you feel. John and I just started trying a couple of months ago. ALL of my friends are pregnant or giving birth as I type. I am the oldest and I’m the only one who isn’t a mom. Today I got my period and I cried while sitting on the toilet. It wasn’t a good start to the day.

  17. I never got the “itch” to be preggers – – but I did have one child, and to be honest, hated being pregnant. HATED it. But that is me, and I am sure others feel much different about it than I do.

    My son has 2 children he would probably be more than happy to loan out to you on a trial basis – – let’s say until they graduate college . . . 😛

    Also, I hear ya on the lady doctor thing – – I have been going to a lady OB/GYN for many, many years, and will never go back to a male one, because she KNOWS what I am feeling and going through! Unlike my former male OB/GYN, who insisted everything was “just in my head” . . . what a jerk. 🙂

  18. Whoa, K, this is major. Let this feeling pass!

    Being pregnant for the first time is nice and magical, despite the fact that it’s uncomfortable and nauseating.

    But having a first baby at home is the hardest thing in the world. You need a supportive partner, a trusting relationship that can handle yelling at each other in sleep-deprived desperation. A relationship has to be ready for that in order to make it through. No rushing!

    But I’m sure it’s different for everyone.

  19. So many people are in that I want a baby moment right now. I’m hoping it never happens to me.

    Glad the appointment went ok. I had one of those lumps and it freaked the hell out of me. Mostly because the mammogram turned into an ultrasound then to a biopsy then that turned into surgery. THEN everything was fine. WHEW!

  20. Ditto to the female ob/gyn. I don’t take my car to a mechanic who has never owned a car, why the hell would I take the most important part of me to someone who’s only tried to play with one and doesn’t have one of their own?

    Do have to say sorry on the baby thing. I killed that clock years ago when I found out they don’t have military schools for new borns…. Not the best with the whole mothering instinct thing. 🙂


  22. It’s absolutely not crazy. Not even a little bitty bit.

  23. I love being pregnant, but am not sure I’m ready for the whole “have another baby” part.

    But you’re right, there are a TON of preggers around. It’s enough to make ANYONE’s uterus sit up and take notice.

  24. It is totally not nuts to feel that way. It just seems to hit you like a ton of bricks, huh? That’s how it was with me. And now my baby is almost 3, and I’m getting that nutso feeling again…ack! hand me a drink, QUICK!!!

  25. Your feelings are normal! I felt them before I met Matthew, and NOW I HAVE THREE.


    Happy birthday to your friend – good friends are worth their weight in gold!

  26. Eating for two is one of the good parts about being pregnant. The other is maternity pants.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: