Posted by: kristabella | December 19, 2006

Insomnia: Movie, Good. Condition, Bad.

I was thinking of this headline on my way home and I was like “damn, how creative of me. YET again!” And then I was like “wait, isn’t Insomnia that weird movie with Robin Williams? Where they are in Alaska and it’s always light out? That wasn’t a good movie.” And then I remembered I was thinking of Identity with John Cusack. Which was good. And then I broke into hysterical laughter.

And the headline of “Movie, Blah,” wasn’t really going to work so much.

So this insomnia thing is really starting to get to me. I’m so writing this post and then getting to bed. Hopefully before nine. Cross your fingers. But since I can’t put my book down, it will be 11 yet again. (Read it. Or borrow it. Either way.)

I think part of the insomnia is obviously all the job shit going on. But for the last 3 nights, it’s pretty much because right before bed, I’ve eaten either Taco Bell, real Mexican food (which included a shovel-load of chips and salsa) and cookies. Oh and corn dip. Which, by the way, is the BEST dip ever. Ever. So, you ask, what did I eat tonight? Hot dogs.

Yep, I made hot dogs. (Who cares?) Well, turkey dogs, really, because I need my pants to fit. And they don’t fit now. And I even bought tomatoes and onions to chop up for the hot dogs. (Just call me Rachel Ray. No, seriously, please don’t. I hate her. Does anyone else just want to punch her in the face?) It was like as close as I was getting, without any more work, to a Chicago style hot dog. Which, if you didn’t know, doesn’t have ketchup. (We do tomatoes instead. And relish. And hot peppers. And either cucumbers or pickles.) And I have to confess. I put ketchup on my hot dog tonight. Because, really, it was a turkey dog. And no poppy seed bun. And definitely no celery salt. So really, it was just a hot dog. So I’m still officially a resident. Right? RIGHT? Mayor Daley?

(Warning: Random subject switch) So as I was driving and thinking of the headline, etc. I had a thought. I come up with a lot of material when I’m driving. And I’m wondering how that is going to change when I don’t drive to work anymore. Although, I will be safer. You know not pulling out a notebook and attempting to write while driving. All the while leaning on the horn. Which honks every time I have an idea. Kinda like that whole thing about a bell ringing and an angel getting its wings. Every time my horn honks, it’s the sound of the proverbial light bulb going off above my head. Either that or some fucking jackass just cut me off! And was probably a Cheesehead!

(Yes. No commuting anymore will be a good thing. Very good thing.)

But if I pull out my notebook on the EL to write out something witty like “Insomnia: Movie, Good. Condition, Bad.” and laugh out LOUD to myself because I was really thinking Identity, will that draw stares? Scratch that. Stares, good. Because I’m sure it will lead to more notes. And more laughs. And more stares. Mwah ha ha!

So I think part of my utter extreme exhaustion, besides going to bed with a brick in my stomach, is (no not all the whole starting-a-new-job-thing) that work is soooooo boring. (Dude this post is all OVER the place.) Seriously. I read archives on blogs today. For two hours. TWO FUCKING HOURS! I mean, just send my ass home and pay me until the 29th. I serve no purpose. I didn’t even mail anything today. I turned my boring-ass, sit-around-and-read-blogs-all-day-and-mail-packages-job into four pages of notes of things that I’m currently working on and that need to get done after I leave. Although, I could get them done before I leave. But I have archives to read. Archives!

(Side note: In my archival duties today, I read this one post where they were talking about e-mailing commenters on your site. Now I pretty much know everyone that comments. Scarlet, just through the internet (should I totally have e-mailed you after your first comment? Now it would just seem silly. Especially since I have e-mailed you for the photo contests.) But the rest are friends and family. Except, this chick commented. And called me a glamour puss (?? Is that good or bad?) and I never contacted her. Thanks for reading, though, Fluidspirit! But fellow bloggers, what is protocol for that? And I guess it doesn’t matter since she’s going to see that I linked to her.)

But anyway, Big Boss Man from new job in Seattle called me on my way home. (Again…tangent, anyone?) (OK, that made me think of Tang. And I was at this party and we were talking about Tang. And then someone spilled a glass of punch. And I was all “Taaang!” The room? Erupted! In laughter.) (OK, and Wikipedia search of Tang came up with “poontang.” I obviously meant the drink. But still hilarious!)

ANYWAY, Big Boss called to tell me about the BIG KICKOFF MEETING! In January. That I need to go to. In Seattle. For a week! Because after said kickoff meeting, I have “new-hire training.” For three more days. Woo. Hoo. Free trip to Seattle! The week of the 21st, Amber and Rich. Free your schedules!

Do you think they’ll be pissed that after I get back from Seattle, I’m turning around and taking 2 days off to go to a wedding in San Francisco a week later? Oh well. They’ll have to deal with it. ‘Tis part of the package that is me.

OK, it’s 9:05. Off to bed, bitches! Before I go off in yet another random direction. Or talk about poon some more. (Must. Get. Sleep. Tonight.)

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Responses

  1. OK, it is very good to laugh out loud on the train/EL since people will think you’re psychotic & not bother you. It’s really one of the first rules of survival on public transportation….that, or pray the rosary. Works every time.
    How cool about the Seattle trip. Need a cat sitter?

  2. you just made a reference to poontang, unbelievable. speaking of, did you ever see the movie pootie tang? i think jamie foxx was in it, not sure though. you should rent it.

  3. I’ve reached a new low. On my blog that is less than 2 months old. With my poon reference.

    Let’s see how low I can go!

    And yes, Mom, I will need a cat sitter. No burrito for you, though!

  4. Your job sounds BOREING just like mine. Except I don’t ever mail things and I shop, not blog! I’d get you a tape recorder for Xmas so you dont have to write and drive at the same time…Friends dont’ let Friends write and drive…but you’ll FOR SURE get stares on the El if you start talking into a tape recorder! My neighbor when I was a kid had an orange cat named Tang:)

  5. At least it wasn’t a cat named Poon.

    I told my job I was totally slacking off because I haven’t mailed anything in TWO days!


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