Posted by: kristabella | July 31, 2007

A Posh Life

Hi, my name is Kristabella and I actually like Victoria Beckham, AKA Posh Spice. Gasp! There. I admitted it. It’s the first step and all. 

I know. It might be a little shocking. The only person I ever knew that actually liked that wretched woman was Scarlet. But she loves all things British. Especially Tony Blair.

I always thought she was a haughty bitch. Always with that pout. Smile for fuck’s sake. Your life is not that bad! And eat a damn sammich!

But as you’re all aware, I am a slave to all reality television. I even do live-blogging during Top Chef over on MamaPop. I will watch anything. Once. Or in the case of that trainwreck of a show that Bret Michaels is on, every. Damn. Week!

So I TiVoed the Victoria Beckham Coming to America special. Mostly because I heard how baaaaad it was supposed to be. See, it was supposed to be this long series. But they only had enough material for one episode. Which is probably enough. Any more and I may have hated that skinny, stuck up bitch again.

Anyway, so I finally watched it. And I’m here to tell you, she’s entertaining. Yes, I know she’s not really a celebrity and shouldn’t have this much attention on her. Blah, blah, blah. At least she’s a singer. And got “famous” from being in The Spice Girls. Unlike Paris Hilton who got famous because her daddy paid people to pay attention to her ass-face.

But you know what? Posh Spice always has underwear on. Excuse me, knickers. She’s always polite to the paparazzi. She’s not beating their cars down with umbrellas. She’s not shouting obscenities at them. And she’s not drinking and driving! And really, the paparazzi are going to follow celebrities. We can’t change that. But I’d much rather they show her and put her in the news and on magazine covers than those other skanky law breakers.

Anyway, back to the show. If you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend you TiVo it (I think Bravo might still be showing it) or watch it on You Tube. It’s all there.

People, the woman is funny. She does the pout on purpose. She’s full-on aware that she comes off like a skinny, hoity toity bitch in the media. And I think she’s OK with it. She hunted down Perez Hilton and bitch-slapped him and told him not to write mean things. No. Not really. He did buy her a cookie and she turned it down because it would “ruin her image.” She said she just cannot smile, have fun or eat. Especially not in front of the paparazzi.

I love that she’s not that full of herself. (Don’t get me wrong, she’s still rich and thinks she’s better than most people.) But I like that she’ll poke fun at herself and at her image. And that it doesn’t seem to bother her. Mostly I’m glad (read: insanely shocked) that she’s got a personality. And isn’t a robot.

My favorite line was when she was looking for houses. And they found one that Lionel Richie used to own. And the realtor said that the house used to have stone floors, but Lionel replaced them himself. So Posh says “So Lionel Richie laid the parquet floor by hand…(beat)…all whilst dancing on the ceiling.”

Awesome.

And really, her husband is dead sexy. So I can put up with her. But now even more so that she’s got blood flowing under that outside layer of skin. And not wires and transponders and robot shit.

victoriadavidbeckhamromeoshopping5.jpg

That man is all kinds of yummy.


Responses

  1. I think David Beckham might be my new #1 British crush now that Tony Blair is out of the spotlight.

    I AM SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE SHOW! See! I was telling the truth about her not being some stupid person. People who hate her just bc she’s wealthy and in the public eye can suck it. You’re right about the paparazzi following celebs and I’d rather see her than some of the others. She was cracking me up in that show.

  2. Dude… Posh is so gorgeous it’s unfair.

    (Marianne is a closet owner of Spice World.)

  3. Oh, oh, OH!!! I TOTALLY watched this when they reaired it on NBC, and then AGAIN on Bravo later that week. I was like, holy crap … I cannot believe I like her! But I did! She was SO funny! My favorite was the trip to the DMV, although the Perez Hilton stuff was priceless, too. And her husband IS HOT!

  4. I thought she was so funny and I love that she knows what America wants from her=her husband!!! Drop dead gohgeous!

  5. I actually laughed out loud at Victoria Beckham’s show – she actually has a sense of humour!

    Therefore, even though her haircut is fugly and her legs are skinnier than my arms, I like her.

    I love me some reality!

  6. I like Victoria Beckham too, although it’s really controversial to say that in the UK. You’re so right, though – she always wears underwear, hasn’t been arrested for drunk driving, doesn’t drop her kids on their heads – what’s not to like? Also: she has great shoes.

  7. Yeah, she needs to eat something! Too skinny! But seriously funny!

    All with great shoes!

  8. I WANT THE SHOW BACK!

  9. I think that pic is the hottest one I’ve ever seen of BECKS!!! YUM!


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